Summer Days

Summer is here in full force. Kids are out of school. The sun is shining. The grill is warm and the drinks are flowing!!

Summer is my favorite season. It's warm and you can be outside just about all day.

Summer keeps me busy. Keeps my mind off things.

Summer is about spending time with family and friends and just enjoying yourself. There is just something about being able to be outside that just makes you feel good (even when you don't).

My doctor recently told me that surgery would be in my future but to enjoy the summer. Enjoy the time with the kids and enjoy this time to just get your body ready. Slow down... I do not really have a slow down button. I have fast forward and faster. When I stop, that's when life drowns me. I am trying to keep myself above water so that I don't drown. I am not a water person in the first place. I actually hate the water so maybe that will keep me from drowning.

How do you go on with summer when you have something constantly reminding you of something coming?

I always love the song by Zac Brown Band featuring Jimmy Buffet , Knee Deep

Wishing I was knee deep in the water somewhere
Got the blue sky breeze and it don't seem fair
Only worry in the world is the tide gonna reach my chair
Sunrise there's a fire in the sky
Never been so happy
Never felt so high
And I think I might have found me my own kind of paradise


Makes me escape from some of the things I don't want to face here..


Happy Summer to All!!!

Surprise!!!

Surprise!!! Surprises can be risky! You never really know how someone is going to react. But you take the risk because you know it will be worth it.  I have always liked being surprised.  And it's not about the surprise that is being given. Now don't get me wrong, I love the what the surprise is but its more then that. It's the thought that really gets me.  I have planned surprises for people before and I know what it takes to pull it off. I know the heart and the passion that is behind the surprise. I know the time and dedication it takes to really make it special. So when the tables get turned and I get surprised,I am overwhelmed in way that not even words can explain. The best surprises are the surprises you don't ever see coming!! My reason for this blog is that I was surprised in way that I couldn't help but share. My husband and I have been married for 11 yrs now. We usually try and do something together to celebrate. Last year was a big year for us because it was our 10th and we renewed our vows in front of family and friends. We topped it off with a week long trip to Mexico. It truly was an unforgettable anniversary. So going into this year I was not expecting anything to big. We discussed many different things but life has been pretty hectic for us lately so I was just hoping for a nice dinner. Well much to my surprise , Ryan had something else up his sleeve.  I had not been feeling great this past week and Ryan had been working a lot. We had not really discussed anything about the weekend and things were not looking good on the childcare side, so i was not really in the mood to talk about the weekend. Ryan let me know that he was taking tomorrow off. The wonderful person that I am of course asked "why"? And then asked "really why" when he tried to just tell me because he felt like it.  So i tried brushing that off and said that we can discuss that later and tried to continue what I was doing. He had to pretty much shove a piece of paper in my face to get me to listen to what he was saying.  2 tickets to Florida for the weekend. SHOCK!! and more SHOCK!! I couldn't even understand what was going on. He booked us a weekend trip and we were leaving in 6 hrs.  As I stood there trying not to freak out to much, I couldn't help but feel loved.A love that only Ryan can give me.  Now little Hailey helped me come off that cloud when she became upset that we were not taking her with us and that I would not be home.  At one moment my heart is bursting with love and at the same time is aching for this little girl who just wants to be with me. She pulled out all the good stuff too. Her little tears flowing from her eyes made my heart break. She even said that I am never home after school anymore because I am always at the doctor . Just put a knife in my heart and put me out of my misery. My heart ached but I told her I loved her and that with a trip comes a souvenir. But she did not care at that point.  At that point I wanted to try and explain to her that  I wanted to stay with her but that I needed to be with daddy too. I wanted to tell her that I will be such a better mom if I can just have this time. But I just let her have her moment and then went and packed for the trip I was leaving for in a few hours. Now I love surprises but I am also a planner.  I like to be able to stare at my closet for days and change my mind a hundred times. I caught myself getting overwhelmed. Sometimes Ryan knows exactly what I need. It doesn't always mean time away but he knows when we need that time. We have been married 11 yrs and we grow more love because of the challenges we go through. It is not always sunshine and rainbows but it is always eventually. We work hard for this marriage and know that there will be more surprises to come. I feel like Ryan has given me a gift that will stay in my heart forever. For this weekend I will treasure the surprises...